I am a shadow

It has been a year of heartbreak. Of pain. Of watching other people slowly taking away the dignity of immigrants as human beings as they are deemed unworthy of compassion. Everyday the line between terrorist and immigrant is slowly eroding. We have become the enemy while the real enemy is out there doing god knows what. We are deemed inferior because of our culture, because Americans believe that immigrants will change them for the worse.

On May, an immigration reform was worked out. It was deemed an ‘amnesty’, forgiveness for criminals so it didn’t pass. Following that defeat most things just went to hell with the immigration issue and giving a clear victory for the anti-immigrant forces for this year. More raids have happened making everyone who is an immigrant shake in fear. Of course, it makes it okay to make ‘them’ shake in fear, they are ‘them’ after all, and not ‘us’. Another defeat followed at New York as it attempted to give licenses everyone, even illegal immigrants. The anti-immigrant uproar followed and such plans were scrapped. It was all done for the sake of national security and not rewarding criminals. I would have believed that knowing were everyone lives and have picture IDs would be more productive to fight crime but that most happen in some bizarro world. The Dream Act went up again and thousands of students who could have become Americans and do good work for the society that raised them saw their dreams disappear in a puff of smoke.

‘Till We Have Faces has a reaction of a friend who wanted the Dream Act to pass, I think this person speaks for a lot of Dreamers.

“He just appeared sad and listless for a while. But it wasn’t ’til on Thursday (a day after it failed?), after we watched Ugly Betty, that he completely broke down. We both seemed to have enjoyed the show, so I really did not see it coming. After the show had ended, we began to talk about our days. He began to explain to me that he had finally been able to narrow down a topic for his thesis next semester when he discussed it with a professor earlier that day. As he was explaining, he was trying to smile, and he was gesturing his hands (he always does that when he explains things). Suddenly, he stopped talking and his hands kept on moving–the words wouldn’t, couldn’t be uttered. Then, he broke down in tears. He then brought his hands to cover his face as the tears streamed down. Immediately, I said, “I’ll go get tissue.”

As for me. How did I feel? Disappointed but I knew it was going to happen. I always have hope of good things happening, even though I tell myself to not have any, but I don’t listen to myself. I end up disappointed and sad. It is a harsh reality immigrants have to face. Most people who know me can see how depressive I can get because of it all, but not really understand the pain it really causes. How our situation haunts us is something we and very close friends know. This year I’ve come to cope with most things. My friends are there for me, even when some of them make mistakes. Thank you guys again!

2007 was a year of defeats. There is a lot of blame to go around of course. The Republicans for blocking any chance of a sensible and realistic reform. Democrats for not voicing their opinions any higher and letting the Republicans do all the talking. The Latino community for its inability to rise as one. Those who are pro-immigrant for not unifying. And I, for not raising my voice until this late in the game. But that was 2007, and we are moving on to 2008, and I hope things get better. I also hope to not be disappointed…